Welcome to Songs of Salvation, a Sunday feature. Each week I will feature a different Christian author to share their "Song of Salvation", a post that is intended to uplift, encourage and glorify God.
And they overcame him because of the blood of the Lamb and because of the word of their testimony, and they did not love their life even when faced with death. Revelation 12:11 NLT
Authors, find out how to share your Song of Salvation here.
I had what most people would consider a not-so-great childhood. My alcoholic father made life unpredictable at best, usually stopping at the bar on his way home from the Navy base. A helicopter air crewman, he preferred life at sea to being home with his family, and always found a way to cut shore duty short and get back to the ship.
My mom managed, for the most part, to keep things calm. She prayed with us every day. Read us Bible stories before bed. Put dinner on the table every night at exactly 5 pm. When I left for college, I decided I would marry only a man of God. I would make sure nothing like that would happen to me.
I did marry a good, faithful and loving man of God. But the scars of my childhood affected my marriage for a long time. They still do.
I knew my father loved me, he was just in bondage to his disease. My earthly father was powerless to help himself or anyone else, so I had to disassociate love and power. In my immature mind, God could be either powerful or loving. I know it doesn’t make sense, but I’ve never been able to completely shake that. So I chose power over love. Not that I thought God didn’t love me, I just thought he had to excel at one or the other. And if He were going to run my life, I wanted Him to have the power to do it right. And that meant He didn’t need my input, either.
I love thinking about God’s power. It makes me feel safe. I’ve always liked verses like Jeremiah 10:12-13. When he speaks in the thunder, the heavens roar with rain. He causes the clouds to rise over the earth. He sends the lightning with the rain and releases the wind from his storehouses. My favorite is Job 26:14. These are just the beginning of all that he does, merely a whisper of his power. Who, then, can comprehend the thunder of his power? The thunder of his power. Isn’t that awesome?
Omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent are easy for me. Steadfast, intimate love is harder.
I do know God loves me. More than I can possibly understand. I know he sent His Son to die for me. Sometimes it’s just hard for me to feel it. So I read verses like Zephaniah 3:17 – The LORD your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.
I like thinking about God rejoicing over me with singing. It’s not easy, but I’m working on it.
In the shadow of the Almighty,