Songs of Salvation – Pixie Perkins

Posted April 21, 2019 by Phyllis Helton in Songs of Salvation /

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Join Christian authors as they share their "Songs of Salvation" to uplift and encourage believers and glorify God. 

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And they have defeated him by the blood of the Lamb and by their testimony. And they did not love their lives so much that they were afraid to die.

Revelation 12:11 NLT

Being that today is Resurrection Sunday (Easter), it seems fitting for me to share my testimony…because there was a time when my faith in God felt dead, and then it was resurrected.

Growing up in a Christian household, I knew about Jesus from a very young age and I just really loved Him. I’d dance around and sing along with various praise songs (at one point, I even tried to write my own songs). I started reading my Bible when I was five or six and proudly memorized John 3:16. I was baptized. I shared scriptures with relatives. I prayed about…basically everything. I had faith. As a child, it was easy to trust God.

As I got older though, trusting God became a difficult task.

During my later teen years, I still had faith in God…I still believed in Him. It just wasn’t the same, and that was because I didn’t put much effort into my relationship with God. So I decided to change that. I started reading my Bible more and praying more, then something happened…I found myself questioning my faith.

It seemed like the more I read my Bible, the more I doubted what it said—and the more I doubted God. I couldn’t stop myself. I kept thinking: “What if God’s not actually real?” And I hated thinking that way! It made me so upset and frustrated. All I wanted to do was trust God and have complete faith in Him again…but the doubt wouldn’t leave my mind. So I read specific Bible verses that talked about faith, peace, and trust; all while begging God to help me stop doubting.

Honestly, I don’t remember how long this time period lasted…it felt like forever though. Every day was a struggle. I’d start to trust Him and then the doubt would rise up. Then one day, after pouring my heart out to God, a thought came to me. It was something like: “If God isn’t real, then why am I struggling so much with this?” I’m convinced that it was God talking to me. And in an instant, I just felt an indescribable wave of peace come over me. I was finally free. It was an amazing and unforgettable experience.

At times, I still doubt…but my faith is stronger than that doubt. God has blessed me in so many ways and He just keeps showing me that I can trust Him. He’s listening. He loves me. He cares. He didn’t give up on me and I will forever be grateful for that.


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2 responses to “Songs of Salvation – Pixie Perkins

  1. Alicia Haney

    God is Good all of the time even when we doubt Him. He lets us see that we can always Trust in Him in whatever. Thank you for sharing this. I think that at one time or another we all go through this, we are human but God always steers us in the right direction if we let Him. God Bless you . You and your family have a Blessed Easter.